This winter, I’ll be wearing an extra jumper and the heating won’t be going on until it’s cold enough to see my breath. Even then, it will be timed to go on when I’ve done a wash and I need to dry laundry. Life is going to get a lot more harsh. At the moment I’m paying £95 a month, and a few months back it was £66. I’m just about covering my bills and I don’t know what happens when the changes announced on Friday hit – I’m looking at £200 a month.
I’ve lived on benefits for years – I’m a single mum to two autistic children – and I’ve never felt poor. But actually, I am at the point where I’m thinking: is it cheaper to do a small wash or one big wash? Do I need to put the lights on? Who knows if they’ll make a dent in the bill, though.
Today I had cold rice pudding because I didn’t want to use the microwave. When I boil the kettle, I fill a flask up, so I can have another cup of tea later or some instant soup for lunch. The other day, I boiled some eggs in the same pan I was cooking pasta. Frozen veg seems to cook quicker and I do it all in one pan, and I’m certainly not cooking a roast dinner at the moment. It’s about scrimping and saving where I can to minimise that initial shock.
I got absolutely soaked in the rain earlier, but I don’t use my hairdryer any more. In January, when it’s pouring with rain, normally the heating would go on, and I’ll hang my bag and coat on the radiator to dry them out. Not this winter. I’ll stuff them with newspaper and hope they don’t go a funny colour or start to smell. I know how many steps there are in my house and how to get around in the dark, so I don’t need to put the lights on. These are the realities of this price increase.
I will almost certainly be buying less food, or food that is not as good, but until I get a bill, I won’t know. There are things I will consider whether to buy or not, things that might not seem big to somebody else, like a weekly bus pass. It’s £18.50, and I don’t get one every week but when I do, I use it as much as possible, and it allows me to go to places that don’t cost anything, like a museum.
It feels unfair. That sounds silly, but when you see the profits that are being made you think surely there’s some scope for help. In the energy industry, those at the top get wages and bonuses that are unthinkable to me. You’ve got politicians who can claim their expenses, so you think does it matter to them enough? Do they really understand that there are people who cannot afford the bill? I’m not sure politicians are really grounded in reality. I’m on universal credit, and I received the cost of living payment, and I’ve put some aside to go towards my next bill, but is it going to see us through the winter?
At the food bank where I volunteer, I talk to people when they arrive and ask how they’re doing. Most of the conversations are about money and bills that are coming. It has been an expensive month for many people – school uniforms to get, new shoes, new coats. They’re already saying they’re not going to be able to pay their energy bills.
I’ve realised that if I haven’t got the money, there’s not a lot I can do about it, but that doesn’t stop me worrying. I rang the electric company to ask what would happen if I couldn’t pay, and they said they wouldn’t be able to help me until I defaulted on my bill – but I don’t want to get to that stage. So maybe it is rationing the heating, and having a cold tin of rice pudding rather than heating it up, or towel-drying my hair rather than putting the hairdryer on. These never used to feel like luxuries.
As told to Emine Saner. Sophie is in her 40s and lives in the north of England. Her name has been changed
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